Welcome to my life

Hey girls. Merry Christmas! Went over to my boyfends parents and got out of eating dinner because I left early to go home and spend time with my Dad and Grandma. Then when I got home I said I already ate at my boyfriends. I thought it was pretty genius, and I'm happy I didn't have to eat all that crap.

Tomorrow is more problematic. I have to go to my aunt's for breakfast and she is ALWAYS on my case asking if I want 2nds and always asking if I've had enough. It's like bACK OFF. Then I have dinner at my Grandmas with all my aunts and cousins and uncles and family. HORRIBLE. They never leave me alone. It's like what I put on my plate I'm going to eat. DUH. Don't ask if I want more than that. If I did I would have put it on the damn plate. Holiday's. BAH! I might have to purge because I have a feeling I'm going to have to eat more than 700 calories tomorrow and that's my high. I just cannot keep more than that in me throught the day without feeling really sick and horrible about myself. Sucks. Excited to see the family I like, not excited to see the family that nags me.

I hope you all have a good day tomorrow and stay STRONG.

Coping at Christmas Time

( Christmas can be hard )

hey ladies,
sorry i've been missing lately, its just been hectic around here. so we have gone out to eat three times in two days. once yesterday and twice the day before because we were out of town. i haven't weighed myself yet today and i'm so scared that i will have gained. i lost the day before but i'm not sure how.
so i've gotten around to making my new workout routine for next year which will be really good once my final semester at university starts. my classes next semester don't start until eleven so i can get up and workout but then on the opposite days they start at 9:30 but they get done at noon so i can come home and workout before i go to dance.
i've been so crazy lately like seriously up and down almost all the time like i'm jekyll and hyde. never outward though its almost like anything i say i find myself thinking about what people are thinking and i've been checking everything four or five times and i'm getting frustrated.
oh i went and bought gillian mckeith's food bible at the bookstore the other day and so far its very informative because it tells you what the food does for your body but also tells you like if you are sick what you need (no medicine).
anyway i hope you ladies are all doing well:)
xoxo

Good morning everyone.!
Havent posted in ages...

I missed the bus so my mom said I should just stay home. This is great! Now, I can stay home and eat the whole kitchen. ): I havent been able to hold a fast in so long. I usa to be able to fast for 2 weeks with no problem. I feel like a fat whale when I cant fast. I just binge/purge. I need to lose weight over x-msa break so I can go back to school thin. Last x-mas break I lost lots of weight in a short period of time. I can do it again.! I really hate feeling huge. And it suckks not knowing how much I weigh. I'll ask for a scale for x-mas.lol. :P

well, so far today I had 1/2 cup of orange juice.
I think for lunch i'll skip and just start the fast5 diet/eating plan.
I also want to try this salt water diet thing but I dont have enough info on it. Do you guys know what I'm talking about?

I need to go jogging. I noticed that when I jog I lose twice as much weight and I'm not so depressed. And I'll just exercise more and the I'll lose so much weight.
I'm reallly nervous because later on my older sister is taking me to her boxing practice to meet this guy. I have a bf but she keeps insisting because I guess the guy thinks I'm pretty( im not pretty). I dont want him to see me and be disappointed and think I'm fat. ):  
hope you guys have a greatt day! (:


Stay Strong.! xD

i_hope_that
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Hello my beautiful ladies! I'm finally posting again yay! Finished my last finals this afternoon and I think I did very well. I already got my final grade from my intense 6 credit english course and I got a 93.6%, so solid A :) That was my most difficult course so I'm very pleased. I've been rewarding myself with shopping sprees haha buying adorable dresses and new make up from Mac

Anyways, as you all know I've been on a quest to get "healthy" (aka back to 111 lbs like I was before college before I lost a shit load of weight) and man is it difficult. I'm about 109 ish now and I keep eating and eating and not putting on weight. Its really frustrating having to make myself eat all the time. It seems like my body has been hypermetabolic which is weird because that's never happened to me before. It is annoying having to force myself to eat constantly but I'd rather have a really fast metabolism than one that is too slow. Hopefully I can keep it at this level.

I swear though, it is so difficult to be okay with gaining weight. I keep seeing this massive creature in the mirror even though I've barely gained any weight. As if a few lbs can mean the difference between skinny and obese. It just doesn't make sense and its aggrivating as hell.

I have a lot more I wish I could tell you all but I have to be off to the gym now. I shall talk to you all soon!

stepstomarrow
When granddaughter, Jada, was born with leukemia, a donor-match was located and Jada made a miraculous recovery. In honor of her grandaughter's health, Jeanna has decided to walk across the country (in the dead of winter) to raise awareness and build support for the bone marrow registry (all that's required is a cheek swab). Follow Jeanna's remarkable journey as she travels the United States by foot.

hey ladies,
so now that all my finals are done i had the first night of consistent sleep.
i woke up at 10:15 this morning and it feels amazing.
so far i have had a coffee, i'm thinking along with my exercise routine i'll try a liquid diet of tea, coffee, and of course a load of water.
my only concern is i need to do some weights to tone my arms but i'm not really sure what is too much. i have three pound weights and i was going to do an hour a day just like my cardio and yoga but i'm wondering if i should do it every other day? what do you guys think?
anyway i hope everyone's holiday season has started out on a good note:)

xoxo

Hey girls! The quarter is over and I couldn't be more thrilled. I have 3 weeks off now to just...relax for once in my life. I've lost 3 lbs this week! Not ideal for me but still I'm happy, I'm on track to be at my LW for Christmas. I just got back from Phoenix for the weekend. Visitng family that LOVES to cook every single meal. I got heckled for not eating that tmuch EVERY DAY. So frustrating. Then they wanted to take us to In N Out burger (EWWW) and They all thought I was INSANE because I just ordered a plain hamburger. They were like "wWhat?!? No cheese?" I was like like "yeah of course, cheese is so fattening, it adds like 80 calories to an already huge burger." They thought I was insane. The plain hamburger is like 400 calories. I only ate half but I felt so sick afterwards. I didn't eat dinner to say the least. If my dad wasn't there I would have just claimed to be a vegetarian but he knows I'm not. Yuck. Anyway, hope you're all well. Happy holidays!

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hey ladies,
so the doctor gave me some meds but she didn't look at my weight, they let me answer them. i've doing really well i've lost everyday but today.
last night i got the worst stomach ache, i've had ulcers and have had to have my stomach scoped and that is what it feels like.
even on the weekends on lost:)
continuing today and hopefully i will have lost ten pounds by christmas which is only two weeks away.
hope everyone else is doing well:)
xoxo